forgive imageAs always, when I read articles online I become inspired. This article is inspired by Intentional Today: How Can I Forgive My Husband.

Forgiveness is a hard thing for us. Yes, even me.

People say things. People do things. We’re emotional beings.

The one major thing I notice is that we tend to allow our emotions to guide our lives in our thoughts and actions. We camp out there.

We tend to live as victims because of it. We blame others as well as things that happen to us.

There’s a point in our lives where we need to take stock of ourselves. Evaluate, be mindful, and be aware of our thoughts, where we are, and what we’re doing. We need to take responsibility for ourselves. Yes, including me. I tend to get hung up on stuff. We all do. At some point we have to say, “enough already!”

That being said. We need to realize that we do and say things subconsciously. Everything in our lives from the time we’re born until now has been shaped by our surroundings. The things that happen around us. The things people say. It all influences our decisions on the way we live.

I experienced mental/emotional abuse unknowingly until I was in my 30’s. I’m unable to pinpoint the exact day or thing that triggered the realization. However, I can say it was like a light switch being flipped. It was like someone turned the lights on and exposed the things that were hidden in the dark. I live my life completely different from before my revelation.

I’ve been through major life transformation. If I can do it so can you. I learned how to stop living in the victim mindset.

Because I’m human, and vulnerable to lies, I fall into a ditch and need help out sometimes. There’s nothing wrong with falling. What’s wrong is when we accept the fall and camp out there thinking we don’t have any choice and live in the ditch.

It’s our choice to forgive. It’s a discipline.

Here’s five things you can do:

  1. Pray about it.
    God wants to hear from us. He’s our comforter.
  2. Be in God’s Word.
    When we’re in The Word we find peace and healing as well as guidance.
  3. Find a good devotional.
    Read daily to go along with prayer and reading The Word.
  4. Work at forgiving, not only others, but yourself.
    We’re our own worst critic. Tame your inner voice.
  5. Find your tribe.
    We all need a group of like-minded people who we can talk to; who can be a sounding board to show us how to do better. As God’s word tells us, “Iron sharpens iron.”

Here’s a couple of questions to ask yourself when you get into strife about something and you feel at odds about it:

  1. Why do I feel this way?
  2. What can I do to change it?

Once you answer number one, you’ll realize your situation was shaped by others ways of thinking. What you can do to change it is to sit down and dig deep into your soul allowing the Holy Spirit to work you through it. It’s hard work. I won’t candy coat it. Once you get the basics figured out you can start rebuilding and transforming yourself to be what God wants of you, not the world!

It’s your turn. Leave me a comment and ask me questions. Interact with me. What’s on your mind?